SERVING STRONG

May I Have Your Order?

Doctor said it would not be a bad idea for me to lower my bad cholesterol by ten percent. He said it can be done with a change in diet, but it's up to me. The longer we talked, the more optimistic I got about his challenge. "Ten percent in ninety days? I can do that!" I left his office eager to start on my new quest.

Sound like going home from a great leadership conference?

I was in the car over my lunch break the other day. I got hungry. So I whipped into a Wendy's drive-thru. As I approached the outdoor speaker to place my order, I struggled with what to get. I finally settled on a small chili. "Is this good for me? Should I have ordered a salad or something? I know the fried chicken sandwich isn't going to help, but that's what I really want..."

Sound like real life?

Are you like me? I leave a conference full of excitement and eagerness to implement all the great principles and new leadership concepts. But I seem to stall as distance grows between my "today" and the days of the conference.

You and I weren't built to implement personal growth in large chunks. We enjoy the refreshing coolness of water from the fire hose. But just as taking small bites and chewing, we experience lasting growth when we make a series of decisions throughout a number of days/weeks, digesting the new information as part of our daily walk.

Maybe I should do some research before I get into the car to get lunch...

Been to a conference lately? What's one concept/principle you are weaving into the fabric of your journey these days?

Headed to a conference soon? What are 3 concepts you hope to get out of it?

A Lesson From Some Angry Birds

There is a smart phone app that is getting a lot of attention lately. It's called Angry Birds. The Birds' mission is to destroy the fortified castles of the green pigs who stole their eggs.

 

What are the green pigs in your life?

What are the eggs (those good habits) that you have allowed to be stolen lately?

What can you do this coming week to destroy the negative impact of these "green pigs" and get back on track to serving strong in ministry leadership? 

...And All Through The House

50 days till Christmas

Whaaaa!?!?

So... what's your plan* to avoid burnout THIS year?

 

*Plan: (noun) A set of intended actions, through which one expects to achieve a goal.

 

Back To Base

Just returned last night from a busy trip hosting the Align 4 Conference in Atlanta. One thing I noticed as I sit in my chair back at home: I like returning back to base. It's the whole rhythm thing Bruce Miller talks about (check out the post on #TheNines about this topic). 

God knows all about rhythm. You see it everywhere. The grass grows, we cut it. We trim our fingernails, they grow again. The sun rises, the sun sets. It gets cooler in Winter then warmer in Summer. God build circadian rhythm into our existence. We need to return back to base so we can rest after working hard.

What is base to you?

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Under Your Umbrella, ella, ella?

Thinking you can beat moral failure on your own

is like holding an umbrella to protect you from flying pianos.

 

What does your Accountability Network look like?

A Case For Evolution

Today:

"Boy, isn't this a tremendous conference? The speakers are so charismatic. The material is life-changing. The music is incredible. I can't believe how everything seems to speak directly to me. I'm gobbling up everything I hear. I'm taking notes in the conference book they gave me. This is a great experience!"

Ten Months Later:

"I remember it was a great conference, but I wonder where that conference book went. Did I leave it in the trunk of my car? Maybe it's on the bookshelf in my basement... or maybe at my office. Oh well, there's always next year's conference."

Sound familiar? Conferences come and conferences go. Great content. Great and gifted speakers. But somehow, we tend to gravitate back to the familiar - what we know - what we are comfortable with. Don't get me wrong. There are some conferences when the great "AHA!" moment happens are our life changes forever. But by and large, I bet the vast majority of us have conference binders collecting dust somewhere.

Weave the learning into the fabric of your life

Instead of going to all the conferences that sound cool, why not take some time to first design a master plan of personal growth? Then pick and choose which conferences speak into that plan. Then attend those conferences looking for specific growth points. Then go home with your notes and pick out three things you will implement that fit your growth plan. Then ask a life coach or accountability partner to meet with you at regular intervals to gauge your growth.

Sounds like a little personal growth evolution, doesn't it?

How do you make the most of the conferences you attend?

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Laugh A Little

Okay. Life's not always easy.

So take a break. Turn up your speakers.

Let off a little steam.



 

Got A Running Partner?

Go ahead. Lead your ministry by yourself. Serve in a vacuum. Don't let others give you feedback. Don't seek out a mentor. Go your own way.

But let me warn you - you're flirting with danger, my friend.

We were born for relationship. If you serve as a ministry leader, relationship will likely mean the difference between a healthy, thriving calling and a miserable falling from grace.

So, I ask you - who's your running partner?

Who is it that creates a safe place for you to vent and process? Who can you trust to share what's really going on inside? Who are you accountable to? Who can you call at 3 in the morning and get a genuine listening ear?

Got somebody? Good.

Don't got somebody? Bad. Pray for someone. Seek them out.

What do you look for in a running partner?

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Help I'm Approaching Burnout

A while ago I inquired of the Serving Strong Facebook friends, Twitter followers, and PowerMail subscribers to help add insight to this phrase:

"I'm a pastor approaching burnout. Help."

The phrase represents a pastor fast approaching the wall. I received a lot of responses. So many responses, in fact, that I compiled them all and placed them in PDF form so you could download it and read it at your leisure. Perhaps you are a pastor approaching your own wall. Or maybe you know one who is. Download it today and put all this great insight to work. As I write this post, I pray that this resource is used to help.

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD

What would YOU add to help a pastor or other ministry leader to avoid hitting the wall?

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Scandal (A Trilogy)

Todd Rhoades, over at Monday Morning Insights, has posted a few thoughts on the topic of church scandal. Interesting reads (both the original posts as well as the comments). I am highlighting these 3 posts because Serving Strong means never having to deal with scandal. Perhaps the more we know about it, the less inclined we are to do it.

 

Another scandal hits… how should we respond?

Why the media would love a scandal in your church

One church that handled scandal well and how they did it

 

Here's a resource that just may help you: Moral Integrity Covenant

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What are your thoughts on this subject?

New Year's Resolutions

I know, I know. It's only October. Why am I posting about New Year's resolutions?

 

Truth is, January 1 will be here before we know it. By then, we will have gone through the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. It will be a blur. Now is an excellent time to start thinking about how the next year will go. Got goals? How do you want your relationship with Christ to look this next year? Got ideas about your fitness, diet, vocational growth?

Try writing down a few things you could focus on during next year. Keep the list handy as you fly through the holidays. Take a look at them now and then. Refine them. Hone them. Pray over them.

Got any ideas about New Year's resolutions to add?

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Misteakes

I just re-read a post I'd written a long time ago. I found no less than 4 mistakes in spelling and other errors.

Nothing I can do about it now. It's been read by many readers by this time.

Bummer.

What is the right response now? Do I get all down at myself or learn what I can and dwell on my next post? It sounds like an easy question to answer, but I bet you'd be surprised how often a few mistakes can lead a ministry leader down the path of total discouragement.

How would you react to a post with over 4 mistakes after it was postted?

Pastor: YOU May Be The Problem

Pastor's Retreat Network (also a sponsor for the most recent #thenines conference put on my Leadership Network) produced a video that I think all of you need to watch. If you are a pastor or ministry leader, consider what the video says to you personally. If you are a part of a congregation, consider what you can do to ensure this ministry continues (perhaps share it with your church board or elders).

I am promoting this because it is what serving strong in ministry is all about. (If you have trouble seeing the video, click here)

A Snapshot Of Energy

 
Antonio Bryant's amazing touchdown catch against the Carolina Panthers on Monday Night Football. Dec 8, 2008

Ever feel like your ministry is firing on all cylinders?

Ever go home completely energized by what just happened for the Lord of Lords?

Ever feel the pleasure of God?

Take a snapshot of those moments. Then ask yourself these questions:

1) What was happening?

2) Who was present and what was going on?

3) What were your values that were being honored in that moment?

These are quite possibly the activities for which you were uniquely created. Subject to the change in direction by God's Spirit, try to spend 80% of your waking hours engaged in these activities. They will feed your energy level. You will serve strong. Conversely, most activities opposite of these will drain you and usher you into a life of miserable burnout...again, subject to the change in direction by God's Spirit.

Snapshot by...

Ever Worry?

The world contains plenty of evil. You and I both know that. We see the brokenness. We read the statistics of death due to starvation. We see the ruin and destruction of mankind almost everywhere we go.

What is the impact on your behavior?

Let the reality of wickedness soak in and you will wrestle with one main question: WILL I FACE IT ALONE OR TOGETHER WITH CHRIST?

Will you worry about things as you strain to come up with a solution out of panic? Or will you drop to your knees in utter dependence and find a kind of peace that makes no sense; And find an assignment from Him to obey; And find purpose in the pieces of a broken world?

The choice is yours, my friend. Brokenness is a part of this life. How you let it impact your behavior is up to you.

Mend Your Nets

He's a fisherman. Fishing is his craft. He also takes the time to mend his nets...

and the mother packs her son a lunch for the day;

and the son goes to hear what all the buzz is about;

and the Miracle Worker blesses the small meal to feed a crowd of thousands;

and the companions gather 12 baskets of leftovers;

a miracle.

...because mending his nets is an investment. Without a good net, fish get away. Miracles lay wasted.

For Conversation: What is your favorite net-mending activity?

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You might also enjoy reading...

Aging Gracefully

A Word From Your Eyebrows

Courtesy Flush

 

Head Over Heels

I was around 10 years old. Mom gave me some money to get a few things she needed from the convenient store nearby. I stuffed the money in my pocket, grabbed my bike and off I went.

After I purchased the chosen items, I climbed on the bike with the grocery bag in one arm and headed for home. (I was clueless on what was about to happen. It was later known as "The Elm Street Incident".) But as far as I knew, all was well with the world.

I was an obedient child. Wasn't much trouble growing up. I had made my purchase for my mom. I didn't buy any candy for myself. I was feeling good. Soon I reached Elm Street and turned the corner. Elm Street was uphill on the way to the store. It was downhill on the way home. At the base of the hill was Sixth Street onto which Elm Street terminated.

Thanks to the law of gravity, I gained speed on the downhill. Instantly, it occurred to me (have you ever had something suddenly occur to you, causing your whole world to change?) I was filled with a sense of horror as I realized what I had done (you see, the only brakes on the bike were levers on the handlebars but only the RIGHT brake lever worked. The problem was, my RIGHT arm was already occupied with the bag of groceries.) By this time, I had reached a speed which made it impossible to switch the bag to my left arm. The racing bike was somewhere around 65 mph* now, beating a path straight to the unforgiving curb at the bottom of the hill.

I uttered a faint, but slightly audible, "oh no" as I resigned myself to the inevitable.

Sure enough, I hit that curb with a BANG!, sailed over the handlebars, and flipped in midair as, in slow motion, I watched apples and toothpaste and nutmeg and a bike and sundries, each traveling in their own flight patterns. We all landed on the front lawn of Mr. and Mrs. Hoey's house. I lay there for a moment. Surveyed my body. Surveyed the neighborhood for witnesses. No one saw me - good. My body was fine. My pride took a beating. I located the empty, tattered grocery bag, gathered the dazed items, picked up my bike, and slowly completed my trek homeward - the bike now in a rhythmic "Thump, Thump, Thump, Thump..." since the front rim now sported a nice, deep new dent.

I wasn't prepared for the downhill.

What is your "downhill"? Will you be ready for it?

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* ministerially speaking

These You Must Be

Are you a leader?

Want to finish strong as a leader?

Then these you must be:

 

ACCOUNTABLE

Who do you answer to for how many hours you work in the day? Who do you share your internet history file with? What's the name of your internet filter software? Does your spouse know all your passwords?

TEACHABLE

When was the last time you listened to the feedback from someone younger than you? Or someone older than you? How long do you just sit and listen to God in prayer without saying anything? When was the last time you knelt before God with your nose an inch from the floor?

HOPEFUL

Do the problems of today loom bigger than your belief in a better day?  Is your trust built on your abilities or on the God who manufactured those abilities? Do you believe Jesus when He says He "goes to prepare a place for you"?

 

Now, it's your turn. What characteristics would you add to this list?

 

How To Burn Out (revisited)

Back in May I posted about how to burn out in 5 steps. This was one of the most popular post of all time. Another 8 steps was added to the original 5 by way of readers' comments.

Here's a link to the original post

Therefore, I have compiled them all and made a free pdf download of them all for your enjoyment.

Click Here To Download

Note: This download is part of the Resources Page of the Serving Strong website.

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Happy burnout!!

The WHY Of Serving Strong

I recently received an email from good friends of mine, the Simpson's, who are currently serving God in Peru. After I read it, I asked their permission to share some of it with you. As you read it, please be reminded that THIS is why it's so vital to remain strong in Jesus Christ. Working with people is a messy adventure. God calls each of us to our own "mission field". If we burnout, we are no good to the God who calls us:

 

Why We Serve

"So many people are hurting, lost, lonely, confused and without hope.  This is the main reason why we came to Peru a year ago and we knew it before coming here, but since being here our eyes have been opened even more to the need of hope, light, love, and God for these His lost children.  

 

An Illustration Of Need

"Segundo is one of those hurting people.  He lives in Belen (Bethlehem in English) where Dalila, Juliana and Laura are working.  He encountered Jesus Christ at the Jesus Film showing during our Love Extreme 2 Iquitos Project in June.  Before meeting Christ he was a drunk without hope and jobless.  Within a month God has done an amazing work in his heart, so much so that his wife is now a believer, and they asked to have the Jesus Film shown right outside their house so their neighbors would have the opportunity to hear the good news as well.  God has also provided a job for him and other needs have been met for his family.  However yesterday, after 2 months of being sober, he was drunk when he went to disciple them.  Please pray for Segundo, his wife Elvira and our 40/40's who are a little discouraged.  We know that God has the power to deliver, and we are awaiting His miracles daily in His people.   So many people turn to alcohol here to numb the pain because it is a cheap form of escaping.  It would be neat if someone felt led to start an AA program here.

 

We Serve As A Family

"Our family is doing well.  My husband has been setting up and operating the Jesus Film equipment a lot, taking care of our guys when they're here on the weekends, taking care of all the finances, teaching guitar a little, making speakers for the church and lots of other odds and ends.  I have been enjoying homeschooling the kids still (we didn't really take summer vacation because here it is winter, but spring is almost here and it is getting very hot again) and just being with the helping the girls here.  They were all so sweet a threw me a surprise party for my birthday.  It was very special.  

 

We Feed Off Of Prayer

"Thank you for your continued prayers and support for our family.  We can truly feel your love and know God has been answering your prayers in so many ways..."

 

This is the organization through which the Simpson's serve:

Extreme Nazarene Ministries

 

This is the specific site for the Simpson's:

Extreme Nazarene Ministries - Simpsons

 

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People Pleasing: A Rebuttal

Yesterday I outlined 5 Steps To Becoming A World Class People Pleaser. CLICK HERE to review the post.

As you may have noticed, the entire post was written with tongue firmly planted in cheek. The truth is, pleasing people is dangerous. It hurts the person trying to please others because pleasing everyone all the time is simply impossible. And if you stand for anything, you WILL make some people unhappy with you. That's life. People who serve strong in ministry know how to give of themselves without burning out in the process.

Here, then, are a few helpful websites I've found online which address the issue of people pleasing. If you felt yourself get a bit anxious after reading yesterday's post, these may be of benefit to you:

The People Pleaser Pattern

People Pleasing Personality

How To Stop Being A People Pleaser

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QUESTION FOR DISCUSSION: When is people pleasing actually a form of compassion to which Christ calls us?

5 Steps World Class People Pleasing

THIS JUST IN...

...forget everything you've been taught in college or seminary. The Gospel is not as important as you've been led to believe. Ministry leadership is all about people. And people need to be pleased, first and foremost. The Gospel can wait. First please, then lead.

So here is your 5-Step Guide To Becoming A World Class People Pleaser (you can thank me later):

1) First, look at yourself in the mirror every morning and repeat these words: "I must be liked by everyone all the time. I must be liked by everyone all the time. I must be liked by everyone all the time..." Continue this mantra while brushing your teeth, showering, and getting dressed. This is the key to your pleasing success. You are what you think. (NOTE: For world class pleasing, studies have shown it takes an average of 142.75 times of repeating said phrase every morning. Some "pleasers" exceed 250!)

2) Second, throw out all your self-help books (including Bible studies and the like). You won't be needing them. They are a distraction from your number one goal: others. The more you focus on yourself, the less time you have to give others your attention. No one loves a self-absorbed person anyway, right? Personal growth is selfish. Some might argue it downright hedonistic. So STOP growing yourself and start growing others.

3) Third, stop standing for anything. Convictions are the bane of the top "pleasers" in the world. When you believe strongly in something you run the risk of turning a percentage the people off. They will become incensed and possibly talk about you when you're not around. You don't want THAT, do you? Of course not. You're a "pleaser"!

4) Fourth, learn the art of face gazing. The best "pleasers" know when to spot an oncoming frown long before it materializes and they take necessary steps to prevent it. Some use the back peddling technique. Others end their sentence with "...at least that's what I've heard." Whatever you use, remember, smiles = acceptance. You must always see a smile. Smiles are your favorite.

5) Fifth, just before your head hits the pillow at night, evaluate your day. On the credit side of the ledger, list all the people who were happy because of you (THEY are your bread and butter). On the debit side, list those who did not show acceptance. THOSE are the people you must be anxious about. THEY are your "to do" list. (NOTE: A bad dream is evidence you are on the right track).

RELATED POSTS:

You Are Not Your Own

My Favorite Zoloft Moments

How To Respond To Every Email Message Immediately

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Clergy Burnout or NOT Clergy Burnout

This post is an open forum. Your thoughts are strongly encouraged:

______________________

Tom Nees, consultant and coach who has served as director of the Nazarene Compassion Ministries, USA/Canada, has written an interesting article on the topic of clergy burnout. Here is an excerpt to give context:

"The plight of stressed-out pastors has attracted a great deal of attention since The New York Times front-page report, 'Taking a Break from the Lord’s Work,' by Paul Vitello and an op-ed response, 'Congregations Gone Wild,' by Jeffrey MacDonald. The Huffington Post followed with 'Soul Care and Roots of Clergy Burnout' by Anne Dilenschneider citing a new report from Clergy Health Initiative at Duke on the poor mental and physical health of pastors."

Nees points out the importance of sifting through what is truth and what is myth. He shares 4 myths about burnout:

Myth One: Taking time off is enough to prevent stress and burnout.
Myth Two: Clergy leaders are in poorer health than the general population.
Myth Three: Older leaders are more likely to burn out than younger leaders.
Myth Four: Clergy leaders are dissatisfied with what they do.

Take a moment to visit the entire article. Then come back and share your thoughts on the topic. Is Dr. Nees right on? Are there more myths?

 

Aging Gracefully

One thing we know for sure: we are going to age. Aging gracefully takes talent. And Julie Andrews has talent. Once when the AARP was putting on a benefit at the Radio City Music Hall in New York, Ms. Andrews appeared and sang a remake of the song, "My Favorite Things" from the popular movie, "The Sound Of Music." She changed the words to reflect how things change over time. Here are the lyrics (read them as you think of the original song tune):

"My Favorite Things"

Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillac's and cataracts, and hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things..

When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pains, confused brains, and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short, shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.

The song was a hit. Ms. Andrews reportedly received a standing ovation that lasted over 4 minutes.

Aging gracefully means accepting change, taking care of ourselves, eating right, exercising, seeking out younger mentors, sharing wisdom.

Are you aging gracefully as you serve in ministry?

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Effective Leaders Do This

Some of the things about effective leaders (in my humble opinion):

• Effective leaders listen as if their life depended on it.
• Effective leaders practice genuine humility on a daily basis.
• Effective leaders keep their eye on the back of Jesus' robe at all times.
• Effective leaders use process but develop people.
• Effective leaders know what they can and can't do.
• Effective leaders engage regularly in what Stephen Covey calls "Quadrant 2"
• Effective leaders exercise regularly.
• Effective leaders spend money wisely (personally and organizationally)
• Effective leaders have an exit strategy (they look for their replacement at all times)
• Effective leaders share their learning freely and openly.
• Effective leaders seek to understand; truly understand.
• Effective leaders seek input up and down the proverbial "chain of command".
• Effective leaders keep their sleeves rolled up in case they are needed at a moment's notice.
• Effective leaders are honest about the present struggle with an undying hope for the future.
• Effective leaders wait in the season of wait and act in the season of act.
• Effective leaders rarely carry the title of Leader.
• Effective leaders love their God, then their spouse, and go from there...
• Effective leaders parlay their learning experiences.
• Effective leaders are willing to serve in obscurity (and often do).
• Effective leaders aren't always widely followed in social media.
• Effective leaders maintain an open line of communication with the Father.
• Effective leaders lay down the mantel of independence each morning.
• Effective leaders pick up the mantel of dependence each morning.
• Effective leaders take time to sleep.
• Effective leaders are voracious readers.
• Effective leaders .....

What will you add to the list?

image credit: Victor Bezrukov

Go It Alone... part 2

This is part 2 of a 2-part blog series written by a new friend of mine. His name is Tim Cole. Over the last ten years Tim has been involved in school work (both in the UK and in the USA with LifeChoices), teaching and speaking, missions, evangelism, prophecy and most of all worship. He has worked for several Churches in the UK, in Maidstone, Kent, where he was the Worship Director's Assistant, and in West Horsley, Surrey where he was Worship Leader. You can find him on the web at www.timcole.org.

CLICK HERE to visit part 1

 

Go It Alone (part 2)

One of the most familiar pictures of the Church we find in the New Testament is in 1 Corinthians 12, the church as a BODY.  Paul is trying to teach the Church in Corinth about appropriate use of spiritual gifts. The core of what he is saying is that NO ONE person has all the gifts and no person can experience the fullness of God's Spirit in isolation. Every part of the body needs every other part. He paints a picture of how the Church should operate, a community of INTERdependant individuals who only experience the full power of God when they come together. One has a message in tongues, one has the interpretation, another has a prophecy and still another a word of knowledge. On their own these things have some use, but brought together and exercised together, they have immense power. God designed it that way. He chose, by His Spirit, to give each of us different gifts, but in order to fully function we all need each other. Personally I believe one of the failings of the "charismatic" movement is that it can elevate individual personalities and gifts instead of realising that the gifts themselves - when exercised Biblically - have a deeper purpose. The point of the gifts are to help teach us how to live and co-operate in Godly interdependence. In short, the point of the gifts of the Spirit, used correctly, is to produce the fruit of the Spirit.

As I said in part one, it can be hard for us to admit that we need other people. It can be especially hard for leaders. We get afraid of admitting we need others… what if that means they don't respect us or they question our decisions? Often that fear is unfounded. The reality I have seen is that leaders who are honest, vulnerable, humble and share their own weaknesses have an ability to bring incredible release, freedom and healing to others. In my experience, I've seen that they tend to gain the respect of others, not lose it. In contrast those who try and go it alone - creating a plastic persona of perfection, keeping everyone at a distance while trying to dazzle and impress, look successful for a while but often crash and burn spectacularly, damaging a lot of others along the way. The isolation and pressure to carry too heavy a burden alone crushes them.

The truth is none of us can do this alone, and we are not meant to. I need your help and you know what? You need mine. That's not weakness, that's not wrong, that's exactly the way God intends it.

 

What are ways your serve interdependently? In what ways are you tempted to go it alone?

Go It Alone...

This is part 1 of a 2-part blog series written by a new friend of mine. His name is Tim Cole. Over the last ten years Tim has been involved in school work (both in the UK and in the USA with LifeChoices), teaching and speaking, missions, evangelism, prophecy and most of all worship. He has worked for several Churches in the UK, in Maidstone, Kent, where he was the Worship Director's Assistant, and in West Horsley, Surrey where he was Worship Leader. You can find him on the web at www.timcole.org.

 

Go It Alone...

 

"I need your help. I can't do what I am called to do on my own. Some days I get really down, I get really discouraged, I just can't see the point of it all. I feel like I am pushing on the ocean. Some days I feel I can hear God loud and clear, other times its like I'm lost in a fog. I need help."

 

Those kind of admissions go against the grain. In our society we are taught to be strong, to be self reliant and independent. We wrongly believe that to be strong means to never admit a weakness. We buy into a lie that strength means we don't need anyone else - or, if we're a bit more spiritual, we don't need anyone but God. "Me and God, we can take on the world!"

 

Well, although that's true in a sense, it's not what God planned. Right back in the beginning God said "it's not good for man to be alone". God planned us and made us for relationship and for community. We are not meant to be INdependent people, we are meant to be an INTERdependent community. Every metaphor the New Testament uses for the church speak of interconnected and interdependent relationships. The New Testament never compares the church to a government institution, a religious organisation or a business. All of those things existed 2000 years ago but the Bible uses very different illustrations, it speaks of a family, a community and a BODY.

Interdependence is the key - as Paul says in 1 Corinthians, every part of the body is important and they are all needed - and need to be CONNECTED in order for the body to function healthily. We need each other, we were made for God and one another. You might be extremely gifted, able and called - but you still need other people. Let's have a reality check for a moment. God doesn't need you to save the world. He wants you to work with Him to be a part of the story of restoration and redemption, but no matter how gifted you are, how big your church or ministry is… you are just a part of the over all picture. You need other people.

Be honest. Where do you need to ask for help? Doing it now could save you and others a lot of pain.

 

...Be sure to come back tomorrow for part 2 of this blog series

Pausing

In Ecclesiastes, chapter 3, we read there is a "time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven." Verse 7 says, "...a time to be silent and a time to speak."  For the next few days I will be taking some time away to "be silent" from blogging and concentrate on a few other items on my plate. Blogging is a joy for me. It's therapeutic. You can be sure I will return and re-engage in "the conversation" soon.

In the meantime, my prayer is that you will benefit from these resources:

The "Don't Stop Growing" blog series

This is an aggregation of blog posts I come across which have more to do with how to BE than how to DO. I believe it's not only important to hone WHAT we do, but also WHO we are in Christ.  There are some pretty amazing bloggers. Each of their blog posts are quality and thought-provoking.

My Twitter Lists

Over time, I have gotten to know some really great people who have really great things to say. There are so many that I've put them into groups. Feel free to check them out. If you don't have a Twitter account, set one up and start following some of them. I have been enriched by what they "tweet". Maybe you will too.

See you in a few days... God bless!

Scott Couchenour

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A Word From Your Eyebrows

"Hey, you."

"Yeah, you."

"Up here, above your eyelids. That's right, we're your eyebrows. My partner and I would like a word with you if you don't mind. You see, we're getting a little sore from bending down all the time. You seem to be keeping us in that position a lot lately. It's like we're some sort of circus contortionists. We'd rather be upright. That's the way we were designed to be. It's more comfortable for us that way too."

"So if you don't mind, quit being so serious (which is when you seem to keep us bent down). Instead, try laughing a little bit. Lighten up. We feel the best when you laugh."

"Thanks for listening. In the meantime, try reading these couple short reads on laughter. It may help you."

Laugh Count

Humorosity

"P.S.  Being eyebrows, we don't get the opportunity to write blog posts very often (as you might imagine). So we want to be sure you know we owe our gratitude to Bridget Chumbley and her One Word Blog Carnival. You can read her blog HERE. If it weren't for her, we wouldn't be the first set of eyebrows in history to write a blog post! Go Bridget, Go Bridget. Go, Go, Go Bridget!!"

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Trials, Trials, Trials

The scriptures tell me that if I am serious about serving Christ with your whole heart, I will face "trials of many kinds." The book of James talks about these sorts of trials and what they can do for the soul:

"Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way." (James 1.2-4)

Let's Set The Record Straight

Not all my trials come from following Christ. They come from my own silly, misguided, self-absorbed decisions. If I want that new lawn tractor or laptop or whatever, but don't have the money, my purchase puts me in a position of slave to debt. That's not from following Christ. That's from following the lust of my own desire.

The examples are numerous:

Staying angry at someone and not extending forgiveness is, as they say, like, "drinking rat poison and waiting for the other person to die". Unforgiveness eats away at its container.

Choosing to stay up late at night and get up for work early in the morning results in eventual fatigue.

Deciding to ignore the kids and deny them discipline at home results in some very interesting challenges in the stores or restaurants.

You and I were uniquely designed to serve God with all your heart, soul, body, and strength. Anything (ANY thing) that we choose to serve outside of that design will bring about trials - NOT the trials James talks about.

What other examples can add to the list which bring about non-scriptural trials?

The Face I've Never Seen

My son* follows Christ.

I follow Christ.

My Dad follows Christ.

My Dad's Dad followed Christ... but not always:

My grandpa (William Isaac) was a hardened coal miner, bound for a life of misery followed by an eternal separation from God. And no doubt, his son (my Dad) would easily follow in his footsteps. But God had other plans.

Years ago, a relationship was formed in a small, coal-mining town in Western Pennsylvania. Someone was serving strong enough to engage my grandfather in a series of conversations. God used these conversations to get into the heart of William Isaac. God turned his life around and called him to a life of full-time pastoral ministry. Today I reap the benefit of knowing Christ because of someone I haven't met yet.

I've never seen the face of the person who was instrumental in my grandpa's conversation / conversion process. But in heaven, after I see the face of Christ, he (or she) is the next face I want to see. And I'll say thanks... for serving strong!

Are YOU serving strong enough to recognize a key conversation today? You may just be setting the course of multiple generations in one family. Stay strong!

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*NOTE: The men were only mentioned for simplicity of a blog post. Of course the women of the family are an incredible force in our family too!

Courtesy Flush

We all get mad at times.

It's best to handle our anger constructively. Instead of stinking up the whole environment around you, consider a "courtesy flush". Here are some ideas...

Go for a walk

Go into a room and close the door and pace

Pop in some driving music and put your headphones on

Exercise

Throw the frisbee with your dog

Go for a drive

Stand up and stretch

Play some basketball

...what other ideas can you add to the list?

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"Moody" Institute

I am moody.

There, I said it. I suffer from the moodiness plague. I don't think I'm alone in this. I think it's probably a human condition. Regardless, when moodiness runs rampant, it keeps the ministry leader from serving strong. So, I thought I'd share a couple insights about what I've been learning at my own "Moody Institute"...

I can't always trust my moods, but I do.

When I'm happy, I think the world is 100% right -- It isn't. When I'm depressed, I think the world is 100% bad -- It isn't. Nothing is ever 100% right nor 100% wrong.

Routines always circumvent the negative impact of my moods.

I know the value of quiet time with God, especially in the morning and evening. Sometimes I feel like quieting my mind. Sometimes I don't. If I relied solely on how I felt about it, I'd be hit or miss. A routine, however, keeps me more consistent. For example, if I spend 10 minutes reading scripture, 10 minutes praying for others and 10 minutes in quiet listening - that becomes my 3-step task. When I feel like doing it, I can embellish the routine. When I don't feel like doing it, I can at least stick to the routine as the base. In fact, it may be a ploy of the enemy to keep me from time with God when I don't feel like it. So I am more likely to hear something big from God in the times when I initially don't feel like it.

I can seize the moment when the mood is right.

If I am feeling particularly good, I can take out the encouragement cards from my desk drawer and fire off a bunch of encouraging notes to people. Why not take advantage of the lighter mood? They are going to come anyway. When I'm in a bad mood, it's best not to make major decisions or say too much.

Moods aren't totally in control of my life.

Although moods come and go, there are some things I can do to minimize their impact. For example, I can get adequate sleep. That keeps my bad moods from growing too big. I can engage in a hobby. That strengthens the "good mood muscle". Here's a link to Scott Young's blog on how to get back into a good mood.

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What about you - How do you wrestle with moodiness (please don't tell me I'm the only moody person alive)?

9-Inch Choices

As I type this post, here are some of the numbers on the Gulf oil spill:

• More than 46,000 people are involved in the response
• BP has reported spending $3.5 billion already
• Nine million feet of boom have been used
• Dozens of aircraft and more than 6,400 vessels have been deployed
• The US government's high-range estimate is 60,000 barrels per day
• (source)

Here's the number I find interesting:

• "The drill pipe, from which the oil is rising, is actually a 9-nine pipe that rests within the riser," said Bill Salvin, a BP spokesman (source)

A 9-inch pipe.

9 inches?!  (smaller than a soccer ball)

This kinda illustrates how important our choices are each day. A small, "9-inch" decision today can set a trajectory that leads to your legacy (good or bad). Here's an example:

You have a pleasant conversation with your secretary. She's not gorgeous, but attractive. While discussing the incoming mail, you begin to talk about your spouse - how she doesn't quite understand your love of golf. Your secretary comes to your defense. She knows what birdies and bogeys are...

NOTE: "You begin to talk about your spouse" - a "9-inch" decision.

One thing leads to another. Soon you find yourself entangled in a web of emotional attachment resulting in a moral failure spewing forth 60,000 barrels of pain per day upon your loved ones and into the gulf of people you are called to serve.

Don't let this happen to you. Don't think it won't happen to you.

Watch each and every "9-inch" decision you make.

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I'm interested in your thoughts. How do you keep yourself pure?

Season of Frenzy - Part 4 of 4

This is the final installment of a four-part series. If you haven't read Part 1, I urge you to do so. Part 1 includes a needed brief backdrop).

Click here to read Part 1

Click here to read Part 2

Click here to read Part 3

HOW I TOOK MY PULSE

At the end of each day, I would reflect back on the events of that day. I would rate myself on a scale of 0 - 5 on nine separate areas* (0 meant nonexistent. 5 meant more prevalent) Here are the 9 areas I watched:

1) Depressed Mood

2) Anhedonia (when something that I normally loved to do I no longer felt like doing)

3) Weight Loss, or Gain

4) Insomnia, or Hypersomnia

5) Psycho-motor Agitation, or Retardation

6) Fatigue or Loss of Energy

7) Feelings of Worthlessness or Inappropriate Guilt

8) Diminished Concentration, Indecisiveness, Difficulty Thinking

9) Thoughts of Death

*Keep in mind, I was under contract with a qualified life coach who also had a therapy background and was properly suited to help me evaluate these 9 areas. I do not recommend reviewing these on yourself without the aid of a qualified individual.

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Thank you for traveling with me over these 4 posts on Season of Frenzy. I would like to know what your thoughts are on the topic. Are you currently in such a Season yourself right now? Do you see one on the horizon? What are you thinking and feeling?

Season of Frenzy - Part 3 of 4

This is part 3 of a four-part series. If you haven't read Part 1, I urge you to do so. Part 1 includes a needed brief backdrop).

Click here to read Part 1

Click here to read Part 2

THINGS I'VE NOTICED

Here is a list of general things I noticed as I reflect back on my Season of Frenzy:

1) Sunshine is a boost to my emotions.

2) A break (to do what I love doing) makes me more productive in the long run.

3) Having a "command and control" mechanism (such as my "Daily Sanity") is vital. I know everything is always in one place. Knowing this, I preserve the mind space needed to be in the moment.

4) I must eat throughout the day to keep depression or anxiety from creeping up and taking me by surprise.

These were just a few things I learned along the way. Part 4 is entitled, "HOW I TOOK MY PULSE". Stay tuned...

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What are you learning along your journey these days?

Season of Frenzy - Part 2 of 4

This is part 2 of a four-part series. If you haven't read Part 1, I urge you to do so. It includes a brief backdrop).

Click here to read Part 1

Throughout my recent Season of Frenzy, I did some growing up. With the assistance of the 4 measures (outlined in Part 1 of this series) I discovered...

HOW I GREW PERSONALLY

1) I was more relaxed than I ever would have been trying to navigate the Season on my own.

2) I was less prone to flying off the handle when facing perplexing requests or actions taken by others.

3) I developed a healthy respect for the devastating impact of depression and how quickly it can sneak up on me.

4) I developed more routines with more meaning.

5) I was more bold and purposeful in my conversations with key individuals.

6) I gained more clarity of purpose in my work.

7) I discovered more dependence on strength coming from God rather than from reading, study, practice. I came to the end of myself. I learned the value of IMPARTED strength in addition to DEVELOPED strength.

8) I learned to comply surrender more frequently instead of after a long period of kicking and screaming in my own strength.

9) I realized that the priority tasks are always less in number than the trivial mass.

10) I learned how to use more block time for greater results.

I sure have a lot more growth to experience. These were just a few of the things I learned. Part 3 is entitled, "THINGS I'VE NOTICED". Stay tuned...

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What are you learning about yourself in these days?

Season of Frenzy - Part 1 of 4

This is a four-part series to be posted this week. This Part 1 will include the following additional backdrop:

These are interesting days. The world economy is changing. Many, many people are asked to do more with less. Businesses are cutting back, leaving survivors to pick up the slack. Churches are reducing staff, requiring more work for those who stay. Sometimes God calls us to start an initiative which is going to demand that we serve outside our comfort zone for a season. These are all examples of what I call the "Season of Frenzy".

Seasons of Frenzy are those times when we are temporarily going at a dangerous speed. I say "temporary" because it's not how we were designed to live chronically. The Season of Frenzy is a harsh taskmaster. We all go through them from time to time.

I could see a Season of Frenzy approaching in my life little over a year ago. It had the potential of driving me into burnout; into depression. I had to take precautionary measures. Boy did I struggle! (I'm not perfect by any means) But, oh how I found success in Christ! (God sure is perfect)

With the assistance of a life coach, I took notes and kept a journal through the Season. My last journal entry of the coaching season was a recap of all I learned. I am sharing it over four blog posts with the prayer that you learn from God. If you are in a Season of Frenzy, I pray that God is free to use the Season to help you grow beyond your wildest imagination.  The first thing I learned was...

WHAT KEPT ME SANE

Recognizing the pending busy Season of Frenzy God led me to the following measures which proved to keep me sane until the Season was essentially over:

1) LIFE COACH. I contracted with a life coach and was faithful to meet with him regularly. He helped me by giving me a safe space to process all that was going on. He helped me "take my pulse" (which we will cover in part 4). He lent his perspective from an objective point of view. He let me vent. He encouraged me when I got discouraged. He challenged me when I started selling myself short. (click here for more about life coaching)

2) KEY RELATIONSHIP. I sat down with my wife, Jennie, to discuss the coming Season. We were very careful to plan for times to pull aside and process together. We jogged together. We walked and talked together. I was incredibly fortunate to have in her someone who truly believed in me, regardless of the struggle. This was a key relationship I desperately needed to help navigate the Season.

3) DAILY SANITY. I posted about my "Daily Sanity" in an earlier post (read it here). This was a simple, spiral-bound notebook I kept to list the key activities I needed to accomplish each day. Then, as I faced distractions throughout the day, I was able to stop and revisit the "Daily Sanity" to get back on course.

4) ALONE TIME. With the help of scripture and meditative music, I was able to pull off by myself and contemplate. No work. No strategizing. No deep thinking. Just simply being in the presence of God, listening.

These were what kept me sane. Part 2 is entitled, "HOW I GREW PERSONALLY". Stay tuned...

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What has kept you sane in your Seasons of Frenzy?

But I Was Sleeping So Peacefully...

Hey, just wanted you to know about a guest post I was asked to write. It's now up on Michael Perkins' blog if you want to see it. Here's an excerpt:

"…so it was just the other night at 1:30 in the morning, right? My wife and I were softly sleeping; the dog was peacefully curled at our feet. I was gracefully dancing a waltz with Andy Stanley as John Maxwell sang “Tiptoe Through The Tulips“, then…"

Go on over and check it out

While you're there, nose around at what Michael is posting. He's also working on a site called Sermon Explosion. Good stuff!

Your Flight Has Been Delayed...

As I type this post, I sit at gate 5 in an airport in Knoxville Tennessee. My flight was originally scheduled to depart in 3 minutes. I have a connecting flight in Atlanta. Our plane is not here. It won't be for a while. I will miss my connecting flight. (think traveling is glamorous?)

Here are my options:

OPTION 1: Rant. Rave. Demand my original schedule. Complain about how hard this is making my life. Yell at the nice lady behind the counter. Run my fingers feverishly through my hair (which I don't even have). Huff and puff. Pace. Stomp my feet. Glare at everyone. Roll my eyes.

OPTION 2: Breathe slowly and evenly. Abandon my original schedule. Smile at the nice lady behind the counter. Speak slowly. Plan for the next trajectory in my path. Make a couple calls to inform the others who are impacted by my lateness.

I survey the Gate-5 area. There are about 32 individuals. Some male. Some female. Some tall. Some short. Some opting for OPTION 1. Some finding their comfort in OPTION 2.

I gotta tell you, those who opt for OPTION 1 are quite interesting. My mind wanders to their home life. Their future. Are they hard to live with? Do they turn people off? Will they die early with a heart condition, high blood pressure? TO the contrary, those opting for OPTION 2 seem happier about life in general. They look as though their mind immediately shifted to "plan B".

I've sat back down now. I've talked to the nice lacy behind the counter. Got a new flight plan to get me back to Pittsburgh. Still have an inch of Starbuck's Verona left to sip. Listening to John Mayer in my ear buds ("Waiting For The World To Change" - irony?). I've chosen OPTION 2 (I wish I could say that for every change I face). Here are a few of my thoughts as I sit here:

>>> Unexpected change is like a neon yellow highlighter swiping across a person's soul. Change brings out what's inside. If there is no peace, ugly emerges. If there is peace, beauty emerges.

>>> Unexpected change is like a gift-wrapped package. Some people take it and throw it away without opening it. Others open it and find the gift of opportunity.

My unexpected change happened in an airport in Knoxville on a Friday morning in late June. When your next unexpected change happens, what's your response going to be?

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Morning Breath

...Soooo, I was just thinking of what we can learn from morning breath and personal growth (kudos to the person who inspired this post - who shall also remain nameless...and, no, it wasn't my wife!):

1. Morning Breath Stinks. Ever talk with someone in the morning and quickly realize what they had for dinner the night before? (Ahhh, Olive Garden, eh?) You've been there. So have I. Perhaps you were the one who ate at Olive Garden. I know I have. We each possess the potential to get stuck or lazy and not develop personally. We see a 2 year old to throw a tantrum. That makes sense. Watch a 42 year old to throw one. That's sad. Immaturity stinks.

2. Morning Breath always returns. It doesn't matter how hard we brush our teeth at the end of the day. This nose-hair-curling aroma will return and must be dealt with again and again. Same with personal growth. There is no conference or book that will instantly bring us to full personal development. Our growth is a daily effort. It's a marathon cleaning. Not a miracle dentist visit.

3. Morning Breath is no respecter of persons. I bet even John Maxwell or Joel Osteen must be avoided in the morning until they exercise oral hygiene. No one has arrived. Not even you. And certainly not me. The minute we think we don't need "mints", watch out! The moment we think we're actually pretty good, that's the time to step aside and get help. Good news: "When the student is ready, the teacher shows up."

Okay, I've come up with 3 principles about Morning Breath. How about you? Who's got the 4th?

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RELATED POSTS:

The Path To Personal Growth

Ready To Grow?

Quick Notes, Long Journey

Compaction Or Compassion?

"Sure, I can help you with that." I hung up the phone. Then thought, "How am I going to help them? I've already got too much on my plate."

Ever do that before? I bet you have. It's hard to say "no". We don't want to disappoint. We don't want to miss anything. Truth is, we don't see the cost associated with a "yes". Time is finite. A day will always be 24 hours. The energy we can expend in a given block of waking hours is fixed. So, when we say "yes" to one commitment, we are saying "no" to another. All that is background for the point of this post:

Compaction Lessens Compassion. Busy-ness is the bane of compassion. I push compassion to the side when I have too much to do. In fact, people are actually a nuisance when I'm too busy. The very folks I must have compassion on are getting in my way. Can you believe that? But that's not their fault. It's mine. Jesus was full of compassion. As I follow Jesus what kind of example do I display when I'm too busy for compassion?

Frank Viola and Leonard Sweet recently published a book called, Jesus Manifesto. The following is an excerpt:

[God is saying to us]: "When people saw [Jesus] in action, they were seeing Me in action. Now He dwells in you, and when people see you, they are seeing Him. And the more space you make for Him in your life, the more clearly the world will see Him. So give Him room. Let Him gain all of you so He can be seen again, to My glory and pleasure."

So the next time I am faced with a decision to take on something new, I'm going to STOP! Ask myself, "God, is this opportunity from You, or will it compact me so tightly that I have no margin for compassion?"  

How about you? How tightly are you living these days?

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RELATED POSTS:

Take A Number

Like Milk To An Oreo

Signs Of Imbalance

 

This post is part of a Blog Carnival on the one word - Compassion. It is being hosted by Bridget Chumbley.

On Slaying The Workload Goliath

Feeling like David against a Goliath of workload? Intimidated at the odds stacked against you?  Here are a few posts from the past that speak into your situation right now. Check them out and see if you can find the "5 stones" you need to slay your workload giant:

Busy, Busy, Busy

Blow Through Your Inbox

Overload! Overload!

Life Preservers for A Sea of Overload

 

Have you read a post online that helped you get a handle on your workload Goliath? Enter the information below in the Simply Linked widget.

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Bumbles, Boobs, and Baubles

Our capacity to serve strong is diminished in 3 ways (rate yourself as you read):

Bumbles. We all mess up now and again. We make mistakes. Everyone does. I make mistekas all the time =).  If you're like me, when you make a mistake you receive forgiveness from others but don't forgive yourself. It's one thing to fall down and get back up. It's another thing to fall down and stay down, trying to serve while dragging yourself along the floor.  Next time I make a mistake I'm gonna admit it, ask for forgiveness, forgive myself and move on. How about you?

Boobs. We all know difficult people. Not the person who has an honest disagreement with an opinion we hold (these people make us stronger if we take the time to listen to them). I'm talking about the irrational person. You know, the person who disagrees with you just for the sake of disagreement. The person who exercises transference of all their problems onto you, making you the lightning rod of their pain. We cannot let these people get to us. Lovingly extend grace. Lovingly extend mercy. Hold out hope of their personal growth in Christ. But don't let them tell you who you are in Christ. (And don't embody their problems as your own. I posted an article on this called, "Bridge People.")

Baubles. They are known as trinkets, toys, and "treasures". They are the stuff we buy for ourselves, thinking they will be the answer to our need for fulfillment. But we underestimate the cost when we buy something. Say you just bought the new iPad. Cool. Now, what will that cost you in terms of maintenance? What will it do to distract you from your focus? How much time will it take to drive it to the nearest Apple store for repair? I'm not against technology, that's not my point. But the next time you are faced with a buying decision, think about the real cost of the purchase. It extends beyond the price tag.

How are YOU doing on the Bumble-Boob-Bauble scale?

Good |_____________________________| Bad

 

RELATED POSTS:

The Power of 10

Overcoming Distraction

The Path of Forgiveness

You Are Here

Are You Intentional Or Hurried?

Pause: If the Serving Strong blog is helpful, feel free to subscribe to the RSS feed

I am an expert. I know that comes as no surprise to you (*smile*). But before you fall down and worship at my feet, let me go into a bit of detail...

What is Hurry?

Hurry is when we feel the pressure to go in 15 separate, but equally, important directions at the same time (at least we think they're important but don't know why). It's a feeling of uneasiness and angst. Perhaps you've felt it yourself. There is little peace. The further you go the more behind you get. You are stretched in an unhealthy way. Hurry is not of God. Hurry is of the Enemy. It is not healthy. It's no way to live.

I am an expert at Hurry. It's my default. It's my specialty. With God's help I am getting worse at it and better at...

What is Intention?

Intention is when we feel the passion to go in a direction that is in alignment with God's plan. It's a feeling of flow and rhythm. Perhaps you've felt it yourself. There is a deep, settled peace. The further you go the more you get accomplished. You are stretched in a healthy way. Intention is of God. Intention is not of the Enemy. It is healthy. It's the only way to live.

I am not an expert at Intention. It's my hobby. It's my ambition. With God's help I am getting better at it.

What about you? Do you hurry, feeling like there's this faceless force out there somewhere judging you if you don't please everyone as quickly as possible? Or are you intentional, doing what must get done, knowing it's the right thing to do?

The path from Hurry to Intention requires a dynamic, intimate walk with Jesus Christ. After all, how else will you know what to be intentional about in the first place? If you haven't cultivated this key relationship, perhaps that's the first step...

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Related Posts:

Overwhelmed Today?

Hurry Up And Wait

Reflections On Worry

 

 I'm interested in your thoughts. Feel free to comment. 

Laugh Count

I went to the vault and found this post from a while back. Laughter is timeless, so I thought I'd share it again...

We hear a lot of talk in health circles about the importance of white blood cell counts, sugar counts, counting calories, and so on. But when was the last time you checked your laugh count?

The folks at Teamsugar.com indicate that children laugh approximately 400 times a day, while adults laugh about 15 times a day. For the adult in the people-helping field, this indicates an epidemic. We've got to increase our laugh count!

What laughter does

According to Psychology Today and Howstuffworks.com, laughter...

• Establishes (or restores) a positive emotional climate between two people
• Defuses anger and anxiety
• Paves the path to intimacy
• Helps us cope with major illness and stresses of life
• Provides a safety valve that shuts off the flow of stress hormones (which are known to suppress the immune system)
• Releases natural killer cells that destroy tumors and viruses
• Is equal to 10 minutes on the rowing machine or 15 minutes on an exercise bike (if you laugh 100 times)
• Provides a way for stored negative emotions (anger sadness and fear) to be harmlessly released

How to increase your laugh count

• Reconnect with what makes you laugh - then engage in it (a movie, that joke book that's collecting dust in your basement, etc.).
• Identify the funny people you know - then spend more time with them.
• Memorize a joke a day and make a commitment to share it with someone.
• Fake it.  Just start laughing for no apparent reason (you might want to do this when you're alone in the car or something).
• Smile. Simply change your expression.
• Give yourself permission to laugh. Even though the needs are all around us, laughter is still an emotion God gave us for a reason. Laughter is a legitimate and healthy activity. Don't add guilt to your laughter.

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Related Post: Humorosity

What makes you laugh?

Stop Right Now

Tired of the same old thing?

Wondering why everyone else isn't working as hard as you?

Walls seem to be squeezing in on you?

The people you serve starting to really get on your nerves?

Then STOP. Stop what you're doing. Hold on every initiative. Quit striving. Cease the planning and the strategizing. These are serious questions. If you are answering "yes" to most of them, you are on a train bound for disaster. These are signs of burnout. These are signs of overkill. You were not meant for this. You did not sign up for this.

Jesus is our great Model, right? Jesus is our great Example, right? Here's a bit of what He told us:

"I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father." (John 14.12)

"Apart from me you can do nothing." (John 15.5)

Our burnout is directly linked to our self sufficiency. We were designed for great things - not of our own strength, but through our brokenness and dependency on Christ alone. When we slowly creep back on the throne which was designed just for Him, we are in the danger zone.

So stop. Now.

Wait for the strength He has promised you. 

Start serving strong.

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LUV My Job

Last Sunday I was enjoying the sunshine out on the deck (a rare occasion for an Ohioan). Perusing the Twitter flow, I came across the following Tweet from a pastor I follow,

"Newcomer's Lunch w/ nearly 100 there! I prayed w/ TWO diff. men afterward to accept Christ! Luv my job..."

"Luv my job." When was the last time you could honestly say that and mean it? If it's been recent, good for you. If it's been a chronic condition, DOUBLE-good for you!

What makes a person LUV their job? Here are a couple thoughts:

I LUV my job when I am spending myself for the benefit of another. There is no doubt about it. When we help someone else out, there is a residual benefit. Inside every person who cares for others is a heart of selflessness. Perhaps that's why a wise person once said, "It is more blessed to give than receive."

I LUV my job when I am using the gifts God has given me. There is a habit among people who sustain strength in ministry leadership. It's called "Align". Proper Align means to spend 80% of your waking hours engaged what honors your passions, personality, and proficiency. When we are trying to be someone we are not, it takes more energy, leaving us fatigued at the end of the day.

I LUV my job when I am alert enough to seize moments of opportunity. We don't merely rest from our work. We work from our rest. When we see rest as an investment in future ministry, we get serious about it. We block time for it. We make it a priority. And when we are rested, we are more alert. God will provide the opportunities for ministry. When rested, we are able to see them when they come along.

What about you?

 What makes you LUV what you do? 

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Coffee Beans And Oak Trees

Coffee Beans

We drink coffee at our house.  Each morning, my wife wakes first and a bit later I awake to the sound of grinding coffee beans.  The smell is wonderful.  The taste, even better.  A great way to start the day!

Interesting thing about coffee beans.  Once we grind them, they can never become a whole bean again.  The taste is delicious.  The smell is heavenly.  But once the cup of coffee is consumed, that's it.  Coffee's gone and we're out the door to work.

Oak Trees

We had oak trees around our house when I was young.  They were huge.  On windy autumn days, we would love to run and dodge the leaves flying from the top of those massive trees.  We would collect acorns and draw faces on them, pretending they were little french men wearing the berets.

Interesting thing about oak trees.  In the spring, they sprout leaves.  In summer they provide shade on a hot sunny day.  In autumn, the leaves turn brown and fall to the ground.  The tree lays empty and fallow through the winter.  The tree almost looks dead.  But again in the spring, the entire process starts again.

You Serve Like A ____________

Is your service like the coffee bean? Are you serving with a sweetness and effectiveness only to burn out and feel used up without renewing to come back and serve again and again?

Or is your service more like the oak tree?  Are you serving well during the summer months and taking the needed rest during your own season of winter?

Coffee is great.  But once the pot is empty, we can never again enjoy that same pot.  Oak trees are there to provide shade summer after summer.  Don't you want to be the kind of servant who can renew and continue serving season after season?  If so, remember to take time to make the most of your "winter" seasons and get your needed rest.  Then come back stronger than ever.

Q&A: How do you rest?

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Humorosity

Working with people is messy (I know, I know. I'm preaching to the choir).  This demands some premeditated, unadulterated, unbridled humorosity. Take a break for a moment and click on the following link.

According to stress.about.com, laughter reduces the level of stress hormones like cortisol. It increases the level of health-enhancing hormones like endorphines (plus it's just pretty darn fun to do!). When's the last time you laughed (really laughed) until your side hurt and your eyes watered?