Serving Strong

Staying Mentally Vibrant In Ministry

I don't have a lot of time, but I want to post a link to Monday Morning Insights.

Great article listing 7 ways to stay mentally alert.

Check it out and Serve Strong!

Married To The Ministry

I married a PK (Preacher's Kid).  So I only have a little glimpse of what it's like to be in a pastor's household (and I love my in-laws!)

But being married to the ministry has got to be one of the most unique situations on earth.  Where do you turn for help?  How do you process all the situations that you face?  Who do you talk to?

Well, I found a blog that just may help answer those questions if you can relate.

Visit THE PREACHER'S WIFE.  Check it out.

Mad Church Disease... coming soon

Anne Jackson is coming out with a book soon that deals with the burnout epidemic in our churches.

Check out www.madchurchdisease.com to read more.

Check out Anne's blog for more information and commentary.

The more we are aware of the barriers to serving strong, the more likely we will be able to Serve Strong!

Do You Have A Close Friendship Today?

According to Focus on the Family and H.B. London and Neil B. Wiseman, in their book, Pastors At Greater Risk, state respectively that

• 70% of pastors do not have close personal friends and no one in whom to confide
• 56% of pastors' wives say they have no close friends.

Friends.  What are they really good for?

Todd Rhoades (Monday Morning Insights) posted a video and asks the questions, "Are you here to make friends? Obviously, it's in your best interest to not tick people off intentionally; but is there ever a point where friendships can hinder your ministry?"

Here's the video:

There are times when the ministry gets to be too much for any one person to handle.  It's in those times we need the kind of friendship within which we can process these times without fear of condemnation or judgment.  Take the time to ask yourself: "Do I have a close friend with whom I can process the ups and downs of my ministry?"

Having this kind of friendship is vital to Serving Strong!

How Do You Learn?

An important aspect of serving from strength is in knowing who we are. There are many ways to understand ourselves.  One way is by asking:

How Do I Learn?

Your answer to that question may unlock a mystery about you that you never considered before. Do you learn by listening to others? Do you have to see something being done? Do you learn by researching something for yourself? Do you have to physically do something to learn it?

Below is a website that helps further the understanding of learning styles. It points out that people learn in different ways. No one person has a better learning style than another.

Check out the website and continue on your journey of self discovery. The more you know about yourself, the greater your chances for Serving Strong!

Serving With Purpose

Check out this short video. I saw it on Todd Rhoades' Monday Morning Insights blog.

Serving Strong in our calling involves a clear understanding of our PURPOSE.

What's YOUR purpose?

Fuzzy Workdays?

Dave Cheong authored a post called "18 Ways to Stay Focused at Work".  Depending on your particular work environment, there are some great ideas to help as you pursue your calling.  Here are a few of the ideas:

• Write out a daily task list and plan your day
• Allocate time slots colleagues can interrupt you
• Apply "time boxing"
• Setup filters in your email

Read the entire list.

Staying focused at work is part of Serving Strong!

Learning Everything

There's a blog I follow. It's by Scott H. Young. I've found him to be a very deep thinker. Although I may not align with everything he thinks, many posts seem to resound with me. One post in particular added June 12, 2008 caught my attention.

The gist of the post has to do with 2 types of learning: Functional and Lifelong Holistic.

I like how he presents the Lifelong way of learning. I suggest you check it out and see how you can weave this kind of learning into your calling/ministry. God is all around us. There's so much we can learn which can be connected together for a much deeper ministry.

Check out his post.

When we can continuously learn, we are Serving Strong!

Got Courage?

"Where do you find the daily courage you need to do your job?"

This is asked by Todd Rhoades on his blog, Monday Morning Insight. Todd quotes Steve McCoy as Steve expresses his experience during a change in church direction that resulted in a mountain of work and stress in his life. He grew gun-shy of checking email or answering his cell phone. That was until he read Joshua 1.

Check out the site. Contribute your thoughts.

Receiving the kind of courage that comes from the true Source of courage is the only way to Serve Strong!

Mistakes That Add Stress

Athena Williams-Atwood, President of Work With Ease, lists 5 mistakes that contribute to stress and burnout. They are from a business perspective. But for those in ministry, a lot can still be gained by reading the post. Here are the 5 mistakes:

• Being unclear with work projects
• Not having a business plan, or having an underutilized one
• Limited planning time
• Lack of self-care and personal time
• Losing the passion for your business

READ THE ENTIRE POST.

Sometimes it's what we don't know that tends to trip us up. Stay on top of the things that can add to your stress and burnout and you'll be Serving Strong!

It's All In How You See It

We are faced with a wide array of situations as people helpers. Each situation offers us the opportunity to choose how we are going to respond. Our response depends, in part, how we view the situation. Our view could be right or wrong. Here is an example (thanks to Kim Klaver):

One day, there was a blind man sitting on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet and a sign that read: "I am blind, please help."

A creative publicist was walking by and stopped to observe. He saw that the blind man had only a few coins in his hat. He dropped in more coins and, without asking for permission, took the sign and rewrote it. He returned the sign to the blind man and left.

That afternoon the publicist returned to the blind man and noticed that his hat was full of bills and coins. The blind man recognized his footsteps and asked if it was he who had rewritten his sign and wanted to know what he had written on it.

The publicist responded: "Nothing that was not true. I just wrote the message a little differently." He smiled and went on his way.

The new sign read: "Today is Spring and I cannot see it."

You see, it all depends on how we view a situation. Here's another example:

Let's say you're an owner of a store that sells precious, breakable glassware. You've had some instances where children were left unattended and broke several of your inventory.

Remember, it's all in how you view the situation.

One option is to post a sign on the door that reads, "CHILDREN ARE NOT TO BE LEFT UNATTENDED. IF CAUGHT, YOU WILL BE ASKED TO LEAVE THE STORE."

Or you could do what one store owner did and post this sign:

Our response to situations depends on our view of them. In essence, you could say it depends on our mindset. And our mindset has a tremendous impact on our balance & self-care.

By the way, the Serving Strong eNews subscribers are currently receiving a series on Mindset into their inboxes every Tuesday at 6:00 am EST. If you would like to join the Serving Strong Community and start receiving the eNews, feel free to subscribe. It's free. The issues are short reads designed to keep balance & self-care in the front of your mind as you serve.

View your situations accurately, respond wisely and you'll be Serving Strong!

Quick Notes - Long Journey

The journey of personal growth and development is lifelong. It's not a sprint...it's a marathon. Weaving balance and self-care into the fabric of people-helping doesn't happen overnight.

One skill that will help make the journey effective is in the use of quick notes along the way. When have you had a great thought while on a walk or driving somewhere - only to forget it when you get to the place where you can get it down and not forget it? I have. I'm hit with a great insight and think, "that's a good thought. I should remember that when I get back." And then I never remember it and possibly lose the power the idea represented.

Here are some thoughts on keeping track of the "aha" moments that occur at the strangest times:

• JOTT IT.  Subscribe to Jott.com. This is a great service of calling in a quick note and it will convert your voice messages to text and send you an email.
• CALL YOURSELF.  Make a habit of calling your own mobile phone and leave yourself a quick voice message (make a habit of checking your voicemail everyday).
• WRITE IT DOWN.  Always keep a small notepad and pencil in your pocket or purse.
• USE A BUSINESS CARD.  If you carry business cards with nothing on the back, jot down your thought there and keep it in your pocket till you get home (be sure to make a habit of emptying your pockets each night).
• MEMORIZE IT.  If you can't call in a message or write down anything (maybe because you're driving or in a meeting) - use the power of memorization association. To illustrate this idea, say you're driving and you want to pick up a stuffed toy for your child, some bananas, a gallon of milk, and a newspaper... try a mental picture of a monkey eating a banana, drinking milk while reading the paper. The more absurd the mental picture, the more likely you'll remember when you get to the store.

Take advantage of growing incrementally over the long run. Be on a constant trajectory of getting better and better at life balance and self-care and you'll be Serving Strong!

Integrity: A Lesson From Splenda

As I write this post, I'm sitting at a Caribou coffee shop drinking my normal Earl Grey tea with a little Splenda. I remembered a phrase in the Splenda commercials, "Made From Sugar So It Tastes Like Sugar." I remember when I first heard that. It seemed like such a no-brainer. What else would it taste like, fertilizer?

I have a coaching client who is gaining the most from the ministry to which God has called him. Let's give him the name Arney. Arney's engaged in what he's doing. He's energized. He's effective and impactful. The reason? He's operating with integrity to who God made him to be. He's true to himself the way God made him. He's not trying to be someone else. You could say, "He was made to be Arney, so he acts like Arney."

Integrity. Operating in alignment with who God made us to be. There is a great deal of balance wrapped up in being ourselves.

Are you operating in alignment with who God made you to be? Operate with this kind of integrity and you'll be Serving Strong!

Facing A Difficult Problem? Try Journaling

From time to time, we all face situations which seem to be larger than our capacity to solve. Prayer is, of course, our first and constant process in any situation. And you can add to that an idea that Scott H. Young suggests on his blog: Keep A Journal To Solve Tough Problems.

Scott points out how writing can boost your concentration. It is a way to maintain focus on an issue over time. He also shares thoughts journaling techniques:

• Split a problem into components.
• Enumerate and expand (make a list and expand on each point)
• Place and sort (if you have trouble organizing your thinking, just put it all down on paper and then group similar thoughts together and go from there.

You are in the business of helping other people. Your capacity to help them diminishes if you are struggling with a particularly difficult problem. Add journaling to your arsenal in solving these problems and you'll keep Serving Strong!

It Got Blown Out Of Proportion

It's inevitable. Small issues get blown out of proportion. If you've lived any length of time you have seen this happen in your own life.

The next time this happens, what are you going to do? David J. Lieberman, author of Make Peace With Anyone, gives us a couple ideas for when we have to deal with this:

1. Listen - Refrain from judging what the other person is saying. Don't think about what you're going to say next. Don't agree, disagree, or argue. If they are upset, you're best bet is to say "I'm sorry". Any more than that and they may get more defensive. Lieberman says it would be like telling a person they should eat healthy and exercise regularly while they are having a heart attack. The first step is to resolve the problem at hand. Then address the issues which led to the problem in the first place. It's amazing how helpful it is to simply let someone get an issue off their chest. In a lot of cases, when a person feels heard, it's all they want.
2. Paraphrase - This helps the other person know you've been listening. It also crystallizes his complaint and helps you better understand what the issue is. This is also known as the "drive-thru conversation." When you order a chicken sandwich and iced tea, the voice responds by repeating what your order is. If incorrect, you clear it up right then. If they get it right, you pull forward and pay. Paraphrasing is the same idea.
3. Ask For A Favor - This conveys the message that you are making their problem your problem. For example, after listening and paraphrasing, ask the other person to tell you what they think is a fair solution.

Dealing effectively with small issues that grow into big ones is part of Serving Strong!

Rapport: A Secret To Conflict Management

Conflict (as noted in a previous post) is a topic too large for one sitting. Over time, I will attempt to highlight information, thoughts and concepts together for us as we continue in the people-helping profession.

Conflict is a common source of emotional (and sometimes physical) drainage for people. When things just aren't right between us and another person, we become consumed with feelings of frustration, anger, hopelessness, and stress. The amount of energy it takes to maintain these feelings takes away from the energy we could be devoting to helping others. That's why I am highlighting ways to manage conflict.

One way to manage conflict (or avoid it altogether) is through RAPPORT.

Rapport, as Barbara Pachter notes in her book, The Power of Positive Confrontation, is "a relationship of mutual trust and harmony achieved, in part, through common courtesy and practicing good etiquette."

She goes on to make a distinction between minor and major rapport. An example of minor rapport is saying "hello" to the cashier at the grocery store. No long-term relationship desired, but why not be friendly? Major rapport, by contrast, would be having a conversation with, and getting to know, a neighbor or someone you meet at a conference.  An on-going relationship is desired.

This may seem a little elementary when you think about it. How can a little rapport help me avoid conflict?, you may ask. But it's a simple principle: You usually get back what you put it. When you are nice to someone, you indirectly honor them. While they may not consciously acknowledge it, they will feel (at least) a baseline of trust and like for you. Plus, when rapport is absent, it is almost undeniably noticed.

Bottom line: Be nice and take a genuine interest in the other person. It helps avoid conflict ahead of time.

Interpersonal Confrontation

Conflict in relationships is inevitable. It is a source of emotional and psychological drain for most people. Getting a handle on how to manage conflict with other people is crucial to the people helper who wants to serve with long term effectiveness.

The topic of confrontation and conflict in relationships is much too large to fit into one post. For now, I am highlighting a number of excellent resources I've come across.  I urge you to consider making them (and the concepts contained within them) a part of your library and lifestyle. If you have any to add, send me a comment.

Make Peace With Anyone (by David J. Lieberman, Ph.D)

Emotional Intelligence At Work (by Hendrie Weisinger, Ph.D.)

The Power Of Positive Confrontation (by Barbara Pachter, Susan Magee)

Difficult Conversations (by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen, Roger Fisher)

Death By Message

According to the Non-Profit Times,

"The typical American is exposed to more than 1,000 messages each day. If the averages person gets seven hours of sleep at night, that's nearly 60 messages every hour."

That's a ton of messages. And I would bet not all messages are supportive to what you're focused on at the time. This leads me to two questions:

1. "How do we maintain focus on our priorities?"
2. "How do we know when one of those 1,000 messages is a "divine interruption" by God?"

First, how do we maintain focus on our priorities?

I Googled "managing interruptions" and I got 32,600 hits in .19 seconds. The resources are out there. One of them was an article by Paulette Ensign, on Daytimer.com. It lists 11 tips for managing interruptions. Click here to the entire list.

Second, how do we know when one of those 1,000 message is a "divine interruption" by God?

This requires a sort of closeness to the heartbeat of God on a moment-by-moment basis.

In the words of Jack Hayford, "Become disarmed with a sense of your own perpetual vulnerability to evil and capacity for self-deception, and awaken to your need for regular breaking before the altar of private worship." We must never presume to know anything. Instead, learn to exercise your people-helping in dependency upon the grace and wisdom of God day-by-day, moment-by-moment.

Learning the art of managing the messages we receive each day leads to Serving Strong!

Silent Mentoring

Let's say you want to develop and become better at who you are. You want to take your character to the next level.

You could enroll in a class at a local university. You could attend a series of seminars and conferences. You could read a book. You could subscribe to a podcast. All of these are great options. But there is a way to develop your character. It's commonly overlooked and it's right in your own back yard.

I call it "silent mentoring."

Silent mentoring is a simple 3-step process:

1. DETERMINE YOUR SILENT MENTORS.  List the people you interact with on a regular basis.
2. DETERMINE WHAT YOU WANT TO EMULATE. List the character traits which you admire in these people. What draws you to that person? Perhaps it's being punctual, or remaining calm under pressure, or being transparent.
3. DETERMINE YOUR NEXT STEPS. List the few things you can do to begin incorporating those character traits into the fabric of who you are. For some people, it may even be talking with the person who possesses the trait you admire. Ask them how they came to have that trait.

When we are teachable and see the world as a tremendous wealth of opportunities to become better than we are right now, we help ourselves Serve Strong!

Better Meetings - Better Time Use

Scott Williams' blog has a post called Meeting Freak. He offers several tips to keep meetings from ruling your schedule. Here are a couple:

• If a meeting is regularly scheduled for 1 hour, change it to 45 minutes
• If you can handle it with a brief water cooler chat, don't schedule a meeting
• Require only the necessary people to attend particular meetings

Read the entire post. Thanks, Scott, for your thoughts.

The better we can manage our time (which is finite) the better we will Serve Strong!

Write It Down

The enemy of focus is distraction. When we're at work, we're thinking about home. When we're at home, we're thinking about next week's dentist appointment. When we're at the dentist, we're thinking about... well, we're probably just thinking about pain (at least I am).

A simple way to reduce distraction and maintain focus on the project before you or person you are serving is the simple act of writing the thought down on paper. I have done this in the past when I can't sleep. I keep a pad of paper by the bed. When a thought enters my mind and gets me worrying or stressed, I write it down. I frees me up to sleep better.

How does this work?

It gets the object of stress or worry out of your mind. You are telling yourself, "There, stressor. You are now on paper. I can deal with you at a later time. Now I can get back to the business at hand."

Do you keep a pad of paper with you everywhere you go? Or perhaps you have a Palm Pilot, or smart phone. Whatever structure works best for you, use it to put distraction where it belongs.

Stay focused. Keep distractions to a minimum and you'll be Serving Strong!

Will You End With A Period, Or A Comma?

I'm currently reading the February/March 2008 issue of the Christian Management Report. In it is an article written by Chip Ingram entitled, "Good to Great in God's Eyes." He does a beautiful job listing some of the differences between a "good" Christian and a "great" one.

He says, for example, that good Christians live the Christian life (i.e. they love God, walk in integrity, are faithful to spouse, spend time in the Bible, etc.) But great Christians do all that AND pass it on. They pour themselves into others. In other words, their lives end with a comma, not a period. Good Christians "live the life." Great Christians "leave a legacy."

Chip quotes Dawson Trotman, founder of The Navigators, who said, "Activity is no substitute for productivity; productivity is no substitute for reproduction."

As this "Doing Ministry Well" post highlights, are you merely active doing a lot of things, attending lots of meetings, "pushing lots of paper"? Or are you investing in a few people around you, training them to change the world? If your ministry to others includes the investment into the lives of others, you're Serving Strong!

Note: Chip Ingram is president and CEO of Walk Thru the Bible and is a teaching pastor of the international radio program Living on the Edge.

Why We Don't "Bridge" People

February 21, 2008 I posted a thought called "Bridging the People You Serve." In it I described the process of bridging as holding the person going through a difficulty and staying on "the bridge" as you walk with them out of their "quicksand."

Bridging helps the people-helper keep from becoming consumed by the other person's problem. That way, they are the best help they can be.

But you may be asking, Why don't we bridge people through their problems more often? Why do we tend to get so overwhelmed by the problems that we are either no good or we burnout as a result of the problems?

Here are some possible answers to those questions:

• The person suffering is very close to us and we care too deeply for their well-being
• Our self worth is connected directly to having the answers to the problem
• Our personality type leans toward having the need to "fix" people
• We project onto others how WE see the problem and get frustrated when they can't see it the way we do
• We're caught up in the emotion of the problem itself
• We try to help without maintaining a big picture perspective
• We take the problem personally
• We think we are the cause of the problem
• We're too tired and have nothing in our emotional bank account to do any bridging (in the short run, "jumping into the quicksand" seems easier, but in the long run isn't)
• Such a preoccupation with our own interests that we try being efficient with the person and give quick answers, only to become frustrated

What are your reasons for not bridging people?

Employing the bridging technique and avoiding the quicksand is Serving Strong!

Bridging The People You Serve

As people helpers, we come into contact with the burdens of others. We are called to bear one another's burdens. But how do we maintain perspective and strength to avoid letting others' burdens get us down and make us incapable of serving strong? Bridge people.

What is "bridging" people?

Picture someone sinking in quicksand. Picture a bridge spanning the gulf of the quicksand pit. You are on the side of the pit. You have 2 choices. One is to jump into the pit and try to help them out. But that would only put you in a position to have to save yourself as well as the other person - you could sink in their quicksand and be no help to them.

The other choice is to walk onto the bridge, reach down, take their hand and walk them over to the side of the pit - pulling them out. That way, you stay strong and they get all the help you can give them without you becoming part of their problem.

Let's look at a practical illustration...

Let's say someone comes to you for help & encouragement as they just found out they were diagnosed with a rare disease. You have 2 choices. You can become so overwhelmed by the news that you become depressed and despondent. Or you can see yourself as a friend who is there simply to listen and allow them to process their pain. You see? Bridging them means you don't jump into the quicksand, but rather use the bridge taking them by the hand and walking with them through their personal season of pain.

Bridging means we see ourselves as a fellow journey-er, helping someone in need...not as someone who is supposed to fix the problem. Bridging means we remain detached from the resolution. It means our self worth is not dependent on whether or not the other person's burden goes away.

A quick note:

Some burdens we share are so grotesque that we must take extreme self-care measures to help us stay on the bridge. In those cases, it helps to do specific things to maintain our perspective. Here are a few suggestions:

• Take a walk
• Talk with a coach or friend
• Pray
• Research the facts about the person's situation
• Take up that hobby you used to enjoy in the past

When we are able to help other people without losing perspective, we are Serving Strong!

One Of Your Most Important Meetings

Most of us have meetings as part of our work with people. Some say that the vast majority of meetings are a huge waste of time. But there is one meeting that you just can't ignore - your block time.

Block time (also called sequestering) is a technique used by the most effective ministry servants. It's a way to get more work done in less time by allowing you to focus without interruption. That's because it requires you to build a hedge around yourself for a specific block of time. It's most effective on those tasks that take time for you to get into the groove.

The best way to use block time is to schedule a meeting with yourself. Don't allow anything or anyone change the appointment. Consider it like you would a meeting with a very influential person.

When your scheduled block time arrives, turn off your phone (not just to vibrate, all the way off). Shut your door. Get all the papers you'll need for the project on your desk. If you can, leave your office and go to a place that enhances your creativity. Some people use a coffee shop. Others need the quiet solitude of a public library. Most block time durations should be no longer than 2 hours.

Learn to use block time on those "focus-required" tasks and you'll be Serving Strong!

Have you cleaned your side mirrors today?

It's a misty, rainy, slushy Ohio day today. We're sitting at a stop light. The trucker just ahead of me is taking advantage of the "down time" to wipe off his side view mirrors.

That got me thinking. What are side mirrors for? They help us see what's behind us. They help us navigate from lane to lane while driving.

The Application to Serving Strong:

We can learn a lot about ourselves by looking behind us occasionally. Think back to a day when simply everything went your way. You were serving "in the zone". Stuff was clicking. You were on the top of your game. Ministry seemed easy. Now, ask yourself, "What was I doing?" "What was going on around me?" "How was I honoring my values?" "What brought joy to my heart?" These questions help us learn from the experience. We don't simply live the moment, we learn from it - hopefully to create more moments like those.

The same can be done with a rotten day. Think back to a time when everything went wrong. You were out of your element. You felt cheated. You seemed weak. Ministry seemed too hard. Now, ask yourself those same questions above. You can learn from your experiences, whether great or awful.

But life tends to take over. We end up going from task to task without the opportunity to look back and learn in this way.

SO, remember to make use of life's "down times" and wipe off your side mirrors. Make time to think back. What can you learn about yourself. The more we understand how God has wired us, the better we are able to Serve Strong!

"Deadline Approaching"

I received a spam email message today and I paused a minute before I deleted it. I paused because in the subject line were the words, "deadline approaching." That caught my attention. It made me wonder if I should open it and see what it was all about. "What if I am missing out on something big?", I thought to myself.

"Deadline approaching." It has a sense of finality to it.

Have you ever noticed how much more productive you are when you're about to go on vacation? You want to get as much done as possible to avoid being overwhelmed when you return. You're laser focused on what absolutely has to get done.

Or have you ever been "in the zone" with a person to whom you are ministering? You know you only have so much time to have a positive influence (perhaps they are on their death bed). You're focused on them and their well-being right then and there. You pick up on all the clues as to how best to help minister to them.

Deadlines have a way of causing each of us to become more focused. So how can we stay focused when we don't really sense any deadlines? Try thinking on these thoughts:

• We will only live for so many years and then we'll be gone from this earth forever. My father-in-law was an incredible communicator for the Gospel. He made a huge impact on a great number of people. But he died early because of a brain tumor which took his ability to speak and ultimately took his life. What he did while alive still lives on in the people who were touched by his ministry. What kind of difference are you making in the lives of other people while you have the time?
• Your kids will be out of the house before you know it. What kind of influence are you having on them before your parental role morphs into a friendship role?
• As you walk through life today, what "divine moments" will God want you to seize? Once they're done, they're done - gone forever. How are you going to be prepared to recognize those moments when they happen?

Approaching your service to others with a "deadline approaching" lense can help improve your focus. Improve your focus and you'll be Serving Strong!

How to listen

Harry Beckwith, in his book What Clients Love, contains a short blurb about how to listen. In the field of serving others, I thought it was worthy of mentioning on the blog. Effective people helpers know how to listen well. Beckwith offers some good advice. Here's an excerpt from that book:

"Don't just listen to what the person is saying. Picture it. As he speaks, create a visual image - a movie, even - of his story. This will help you understand, follow, and remember his story - and even help you remember it a month later. It can help you remember that Sue Crolick's daughter Jessie is living in a well-worn Victorian near Haight-Ashbury in San Francisco, and that Jessie's boyfriend is training for the Olympics in the triathlon after switching from rowing. If you retained only the words of that story and not the images, you'd forget it the next day.

Don't listen with your ears. Listen with your eyes."

Keep up your skill of listening and you'll be Serving Strong!

A brand new year

Well, here we are. An entire new year lay before us. Full of opportunity. Full of possibility.

As we embark on 2008 together, I have some general thoughts that are begging to be put down on paper so here they are in no particular order (do with them whatever you want):

• It all comes down to the walk. I can attend seminars, read books, meet great people, and see great events unfold. But when it comes to my balance and self care in serving other people, it comes down to my individual choices. I don't grow simply by knowing great people or attending the right seminars. It takes individual effort on a regular basis.
• A day is still just a day. When I come to work, I will have enough on my plate to accomplish. Some days my plate is incredibly full. Other days, I am on top of my game and everything I plan to do gets done. But there will never be more than 24 hours in a day. This year, I will do my best not to get so uptight & nervous when I am overwhelmed. God knows what I have to face. I will rely on Him to help me discern what's priority during the busy times.
• The big picture. There will be many times when the details get overwhelming. I will be further ahead if I can periodically put on by "big picture" lenses and not get so caught up in the detail.
• The weekly review. I have so many times penned plans that were great and motivating to me. But then, after a while, I lose steam and forget why I set out to do what I planned. This year, I want to look at my priorities at least on a weekly basis. I want to ask myself the hard questions which will keep me on track.
• Always growing, always learning. This year I want to be 100% present wherever I am. I want to learn from other people, learn from my own responses, learn from my circumstances. I want to listen not just with my ears, but by observing and questioning what has become status quo.
• Centered. The longer I live, the more I believe in the concept of centering. At the core of my being is the leadership of God. When I take over for myself, I inevitably fail. So, everything I say, do, think, read, listen to will be filtered through the central command of God's leadership.

I trust this year of 2008 will be a GREAT year of Serving Strong for you!

Are you learning but never seem to get any smarter?

Ken Blanchard, Paul J. Meyer and Dick Ruhe have published the book, Know Can Do! in which they highlight the obstacles that prevent people from implementing what they learn. These obstacles include:

• Information Overload (too much learning in too little time)
• Negative Filtering (holding onto negative thought processes which prevent an open mind)
• Lack Of Follow-Up (not having a plan to put the new knowledge into action)

I have indicated in previous posts that there are two well-documented realities:

1. First Reality: There is overwhelming evidence that pastors are struggling with burnout, depression, stress, low self-esteem, loneliness, and obesity. Some say is is a result of the very profession pastors are in. They are expected to be all things to all people. Plus they are dealing with people and their struggles.
2. Second Reality: There is an over-abundance of information that addresses burnout, depression, stress, low self-esteem, loneliness, and obesity. I Google'd "stress" the other day resulting in over 285,000,000 hits in 0.5 seconds. The first page of results gave me enough information to learn what good stress is, what bad stress is, what its effect is on my life, and steps I can take to reduce the bad stress from my life.

There is a gap between the struggle pastors face and the resources that sit in bookshelves and websites across the world. The problem is in what the autuhors highlight in Know Can do!

Coaching is the key to filling this gap. With a personal coach, a pastor overcomes the obstacles mentioned above:

• The learning is in smaller bits of information more frequently
• The pastor and coach discover a positive perspective for longer-lasting impact
• The pastor and coach design a follow up plan of action that is do-able

Check out more about what coaching is.

Contact me if you're interested in exploring a coaching benefit for yourself. Learn the art of weaving balance and self-care into the fabric of your ministry.

Thinking ahead

Ever found yourself in the middle of a thousand tasks and ask yourself, "How in the world did I get here?" I have. It creeps up on me. I'm doing fine, on top of things, and then POW, I'm knee deep in responsibilities that are pulling me in 15 different directions at once.

Life is that way sometimes. But we can minimize this occurrence by thinking ahead. To illustrate, I thought of this concept when I was returning to my office from a meeting. I knew I needed gas and the Sheetz station was up ahead on the right. So, before I approached the stop light, I moved into the right lane - in anticipation of turning right into the gas station. I was thinking ahead. In fact, while sitting at the light, I snapped a picture from the driver's seat (for those visuals reading this post!)

We can take this same concept into our balance and self-care. Here are a few examples:

• Think ahead and plan to accomplish some light duty tasks just before that potentially negative meeting with someone in a few hours.
• Think ahead and plan to take some time off just after officiating an especially difficult funeral.
• Think ahead and plan some block time to do some research if you've been asked to present on a topic a month from now.

Thinking ahead won't always keep the multitude of tasks from creeping up occasionally and making us feel overwhelmed. But it will help us keep it to a minimum.

Think ahead and you'll be Serving Strong!

Multi-tasking: Friend or foe?

Do you multi-task?

It’s the way things are done these days.  The introduction of the laptop, PDA, phones with internet, podcasting, and TV capability make multi-tasking a common occurrence among most people these days.  In fact, it seems if you can multi-task "effectively" you are among the elite in making things happen.

Does multi-tasking make you more effective?

Those at www.projectmanagementsource.com say multi-tasking is one of many ways to save time on the job.  Here’s an excerpt from their website (time saving tip on the job - tip #11):

“Multitask. Jobs that are not too critical and don’t require 100% concentration can be clubbed together –exercise while you catch up on your favorite program, or cut coupons while talking on the telephone. At the office, you can send routine emails while talking on the phone. Multitasking frees 30-60 minutes of time to be used later in the day.”

On